Showing Their Emotional Side
by Judith Bowman on 10/30/14
What if it was Martha Coakley who cried?
Charlie Baker broke down in tears on the [Massachusetts] gubernatorial debate stage as he told the story of a fisherman’s family plight.
It was received by most, including me, as a genuine, justified show of human emotion. A real moment in the artificial world of politics.
But what if it was Martha?
No such luck. Professional women don't cry. Not if they want to be leaders.
She would have been seen as weak, overly-emotional because this is the stereotype women face.
This is the reality. Women who cry at work are considered ineffective, unable to handle difficult decisions or play in the big leagues or yes, serve in the Corner Office of the State House.
Crying at work also affects women disproportionately. They feel inadequate. They feel they have failed some test. When Mika Brzezinski, now co-host of MSNBC’s "Morning Joe," was fired from CBS, she cried in front of the president of the news division.
"When you cry at work, you give away your power," Brzezinski later said. "When you are in control of your emotions, you are communicating you are in control."
The intensity of a political campaign takes a toll. Crying relieves stress. People get that. It may have been uncomfortable and awkward to watch Baker tear up, but it was a powerful moment to his benefit.
I liked that the former CEO showed us his heart. I trusted him. He also made us feel his compassion with fishing industry challenges.
At Tuesday's gubernatorial debate, Coakley said she last cried that same day while attending a memorial service for a union organizer who had died of leukemia — the same disease that killed her mother. She kept her emotions in check while answering the question.
Baker, on the other hand, fought to control his emotions as he told of crying over a struggling New Bedford fisherman who said he sidelined his two sons from taking college athletic scholarships to join him on the boat.
Baker showed us not only his emotional side, but successfully demonstrated his ability to connect with his audience in a way some are calling the best political move of his candidacy.
Coakley was more mechanical, some say more technical. But what choice did she have? After all she is a woman.
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